moan, whine, complain

Hi guys. Sorry about not updating...it's mostly because I have no new pictures and because I only have complaints. I should be really excited that we've made it this far into our pregnancy, because it's the farthest we've ever been, officially 37 weeks 1 day. And I do feel blessed that we kept Sam in so long and that I'm healthy. But 9 months pregnant doesn't feel healthy in any way, shape or form. I measured...I'm more than four feet around. Around, not tall. I can't turn over well in bed and I get charley horses in all my major muscles. I'm in constant pain and I waddle really bad. Sam doesn't like my practice contractions and instead of lying low for the duration like my other kids, he kicks at me, adding insult to injury.

Jed and the kids have been wonderful. They're helping with everything from buckling my shoes to bringing me water to doing my chores. I avoided bed-rest, which is wonderful because I still need to make meals, but I can't do much else or stand longer than 5 minutes so I feel useless. Jed took us out for our last Saturday as the family we've been for the past 6 years; from now on either Mom and/or Sam will be with us forever. We went to Johnny Rocket's and feasted on burgers and fries and chocolate milk. It made me kind of sad because we've reached a good time where everyone's pretty comfortable with our lives and routines and our place in the family, and now it all will change. I know that it will be wonderful in many ways but the list of cons is long as well (buckets of diapers, anyone?).

From what I've seen so far it will probably be hardest on Aidan; he's excited to be a big brother but his behaviors are regressing (toileting accidents and needing to be fed to finish a meal) and I don't know how to help him with this. We read the kids a book called "Babies Don't Eat Pizza" and they loved it; but then Abby picked out a book at the library called "No one asked me if I wanted to be a big sister". That made me sad cause I thought she was cool with it all. I guess only the next couple months will tell.

Maybe all these downerisms can be attributed to the weather; while I'm feeling blessed and grateful not to have Cassondra's oppressive Las Vegas heat, we've been sunless for two whole weeks. So me, the tomatoes, and the strawberries are all pale and drab in mood. I'm sure I'll feel better when Mom gets here Thursday and can help with the laundry. And maybe we'll have sun later this week.

And maybe I'll have the baby any minute now and it will be all better because I can hold him and cuddle him. :D That's all I really want.